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http://msnbc.msn.com/id/14608725/

Those are some great ones, Kraj. :) My version of the one above used to be "Colder than Rush Limbaugh's heart" but my coworker had the perfect comeback: "What heart?" These days I'd update it to Ann Coulter. (Jeez, just typing that name I hear the horses whinny like in Young Frankenstein...

Life is too short to drink cheap beer. ~Warsteiner's slogan

That thang's big enough to stand flat-footed and f*** a turkey! ~Appalachian coworker, in regard to a cockroach found in the ladies room.

Never tell a man everything you know, and don't trust them as far as you can throw them. ~Grandma Don't look for a gifted child, look for the gift in each child. Nothing else in nature behaves so consistently and rigidly as a human being in pursuit of hell. Just because you're paranoid...

Where are they going to get all that sand? :confused:

I think this is deliberate on the administration's part, done to protect us. We've heard hundreds of times that the U.S. is a terrorist target because "they hate us for our freedom." So their approach seems to be to wittle away at those freedoms and rights until they are all gone, then the...

Yup, "properly" was an odd word to use in the context...moral of the story, don't drink and post. :D I'm glad you know what I meant. Maybe the way I should have phrased it is, when going through such a terrible loss it really is comforting to know that there is at least one thing you don't...

The point is not that money is supposed to make you "feel better" if someone you love dies. The point is that in most cases, especially for women, losing an employed spouse can financially devastate a person. Imagine the horrible grief of losing your partner, the love of your life. Now imagine...

Wow, that joke just keeps getting funnier every time it's posted here. :rolleyes:

Oh dear, I read that at first as "Knicker lacquer"...it changes the tone of the saying quite a lot! *sigh* My dad was a bit of a snooker shark in his youth. :(

No, those earn you a fate worse than death! :mad:

The "church" (actually comprised of those members of his immediate family who haven't managed to escape) is being sued by the father of one of those soldiers for invasion of privacy. Me, I would have tossed on "intentional infliction of emotional harm" as well. From the quotes I read, they...

Well, my bf took me out to dinner, then he got mad at me and stomped off to bed and I slept on the couch. So yeah, great day! woohoo!

Arrrrr, me hearties!!!! Thank you all for the good wishes. :-) I'll let you know if I get that new eyepatch I've been hankerin' after!

I think it's a whored-up version of "I'm sorry you're an idiot."

And to quote Television without Pity, "His lice have herpes". I admit I've gotten into the show for the past two seasons. Fantasia had a couple performances that brought tears to my eyes, and that says something regardless of what you think of reality TV.

I hope her coach ripped her a new one after that. I'm so tired of Bode's Colin Farrell routine. I like that Liggety guy much better - just keep your mouth shut and do your job.

Me, I thought it was Cheney's hunting technique. :D

Well, if the rebuplicans are willing to shoot their friends in the face, imagine what they're capable of doing to the folks that don't fall in line with their plans! :eek: Wow! She sounds like a real c...oh wait, never mind. :o