Clever Signs (1 Viewer)

Pat Hartman

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A friend just sent this and I thought it was funny so I'm sharing:)
A SIGN IN A SHOE REPAIR STORE

"We will heel you.

We will save your sole.

We will even dye for you."



A SIGN ON A BLINDS AND CURTAIN TRUCK:

“Blind man driving.”



Sign over a Gynecologist's Office:

"Dr. Jones, at your cervix.”



In a Podiatrist's office:

"Time wounds all heels.”



On a Septic Tank Truck:

"Yesterday's Meals on Wheels."



At an Optometrist's Office:

"If you don't see what you're looking for,

You've come to the right place.”



On a Plumber's truck:

"We repair what your husband fixed.”



On another Plumber's truck:

"Don't sleep with a drip. Call your plumber.”



At a Tire Shop

"Invite us to your next blowout.”



On an Electrician's truck:

"Let us remove your shorts.”



In a Non-smoking Area:

"If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and

will take appropriate action with a fire extinguisher.”



On a Maternity Room door :

"Push. Push. Push.”



At a Car Dealership:

"The best way to get back on your feet - miss a car payment.”



Outside a Muffler Shop:

"No appointment necessary. We hear you coming.”



In a Veterinarian's waiting room:

"Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!”



At the Electric Company:

"We would be delighted if you send in your payment on time.

However, if you don't, YOU will be de-lighted.”



In a Restaurant window:

"Don't stand there and be hungry; come on in and get fed up.”



In the front yard of a Funeral Home:

"Drive carefully. We'll wait.”



At a Propane Filling Station:

"Thank Heaven for little grills.”



In a Radiator Shop:

"Best place in town to take a leak.”



And the best one for last:

Sign on the back of another Septic Tank Truck:

“Caution - This Truck is full of Political Promises!”​
 

KitaYama

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KitaYama

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The_Doc_Man

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Bill Engvall is a comedian who does a "stupid signs" routine. Things like, "Why does the inside of the door on a transcontinent jet plane say 'Do not open while in flight'?"
 

CJ_London

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Years ago there was a pub (sadly now converted to housing) nearby with all sorts of jokey signs. My favourite was a door in the main bar with a sign which said in large letters
‘This door does not open’
The locals had a lot of amusement watching newbies trying to open it.

the door was just a door attached to the wall

most newbies said they didn’t see the sign
 

Minty

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An old local pub haunt of mine was run by a somewhat curmudgeonly Landlord.
He had edited the open/close sign to say

"Sorry We Are Open"

Always made me chuckle.
 

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