Couples strange fights - tell us yours (1 Viewer)
- Thread starter Jon
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When the new fangled pump soap dispensers came out, they appeared all over our house. I was not impressed with this expensive extravagance, where a bar of soap has served me well for decades. Now, the one in the kitchen is next to the Fairy liquid, and when it gets low I top it up with a couple of squirts of Fairy liquid and water. However within a couple of days it's binned and a new soap dispenser appears in its place. This is one of those little Wars that is never spoken about.
Well, as long as I accept she's right we are at peace. No fight at all.
During our 34 years of marriage, most of our fights have been over raising and education of our two sons. I've always been very strict and have expected them to be the best in class, school and university. But she believes there's other aspects of life too and not every well-graduated individual is happy with his life.
Now that they are grown up and out of our control, it's very rare to have an argument. (mostly because I accept she's always correct
)
As I mentioned in the other thread, recently we both heated up over Adam and the way I behaved, but it was one of those rare cases and I don't think will happen again.
During our 34 years of marriage, most of our fights have been over raising and education of our two sons. I've always been very strict and have expected them to be the best in class, school and university. But she believes there's other aspects of life too and not every well-graduated individual is happy with his life.
Now that they are grown up and out of our control, it's very rare to have an argument. (mostly because I accept she's always correct
)As I mentioned in the other thread, recently we both heated up over Adam and the way I behaved, but it was one of those rare cases and I don't think will happen again.
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Our usual arguments are over household chores. My sweetie has worked for a living but for a long time she was a housewife.... 'scuse me, that should read "domestic engineer goddess" in order to maintain peace. Anyway, there are some things that she does that drive me bonkers having to do with rotating the positions of the chairs for the dining room table so that they wear evenly. Also, stacking the towels in alternating light and dark and replacing them in a certain way in the linen closet. Also using the drinking glasses in a particular order to even out the wear. I love her dearly but there are times when her OCD flares up and we discuss the "proper way" to do things.
NauticalGent
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Good lord, where to begin...
My wife is an extreme introvert. When she meets new people, her quiet demeanor makes them think she is stuck up and unfriendly. I have learned the hard way that the worst thing I can do to her is draw attention to her an/or make her the butt of a joke.
She is also very competitive and HAS to be right...her cc's whole family is like that and get togethers can be REAL fun...
Our strange/silly/stupid arguments have been many but for the most part harmless and the only reason they are quicky over is because I am quick to apologize.
However...there was this one time in Scotland, Inverness to be specific - we were walking along the loch with another couple. The topic of day light savings time came up and she and I had a different opinion on it. I really cant remember the details but the argument got heated...so much so she turned away in a huff and headed back to the B&B.
Normally I would have went after her and simply talked her off the ledge and diffused the situation. Not this time. I let her go and continued the sight seeing and made my way back to the room.
When I got back, I could tell she had been crying and doing angry research with Dr. Google. She admitted to me that I was right but of course there was a caveat that I simply let go. What really made her mad was that I belittled her opinion in front of people.
Of course I apologized and all ended well...but to think a whole evening was wasted and tears shed over a topic that simply wasn't worth it.
The things we do for love...
My wife is an extreme introvert. When she meets new people, her quiet demeanor makes them think she is stuck up and unfriendly. I have learned the hard way that the worst thing I can do to her is draw attention to her an/or make her the butt of a joke.
She is also very competitive and HAS to be right...her cc's whole family is like that and get togethers can be REAL fun...
Our strange/silly/stupid arguments have been many but for the most part harmless and the only reason they are quicky over is because I am quick to apologize.
However...there was this one time in Scotland, Inverness to be specific - we were walking along the loch with another couple. The topic of day light savings time came up and she and I had a different opinion on it. I really cant remember the details but the argument got heated...so much so she turned away in a huff and headed back to the B&B.
Normally I would have went after her and simply talked her off the ledge and diffused the situation. Not this time. I let her go and continued the sight seeing and made my way back to the room.
When I got back, I could tell she had been crying and doing angry research with Dr. Google. She admitted to me that I was right but of course there was a caveat that I simply let go. What really made her mad was that I belittled her opinion in front of people.
Of course I apologized and all ended well...but to think a whole evening was wasted and tears shed over a topic that simply wasn't worth it.
The things we do for love...
Isaac
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After 21 years we very rarely argue about anything. The virus has brought up a few arguments. I'm a little lower on the scale of "how many precautions do you take" than she is, so a few things she insists on bother me a bit, like spraying Lysol on the bottom of my shoes anytime I come in the house (??!) but for the most part it's pretty smooth sailing at this point. Time has a way of eliminating a lot of dumber issues we fought about when we were younger.
Here's one that NO ONE can win, I bet.
She says I'm always correcting her. "Well, don't always be wrong then" didn't help even though it was in jest. So I said "how would you know if I'm ALWAYS correcting you, because if you said something that was inaccurate and I didn't say anything about that, then you wouldn't know that I didn't correct you? You would never know how many times I didn't correct you thus you can't possibly say that."
So I stopped and let her go on saying things that are often incorrect and thought OK, I'll make a list of things that I let go and when I get several items I'll say "see, I don't always correct you" until I realized she'll say - "you just did" when I provide examples.
Now I just let her disseminate incorrect info to others as long at it won't be harmful and wait for it to come back and bite. If it doesn't, I figure no harm done and I avoided another black mark. If it does come back to bite and she says anything I won't be able to say " Well I knew you were wrong but you don't want me to correct you" because that will just be a different black mark.
Sometimes you just can't win, and it's smarter to not try - ever.
She says I'm always correcting her. "Well, don't always be wrong then" didn't help even though it was in jest. So I said "how would you know if I'm ALWAYS correcting you, because if you said something that was inaccurate and I didn't say anything about that, then you wouldn't know that I didn't correct you? You would never know how many times I didn't correct you thus you can't possibly say that."
So I stopped and let her go on saying things that are often incorrect and thought OK, I'll make a list of things that I let go and when I get several items I'll say "see, I don't always correct you" until I realized she'll say - "you just did" when I provide examples.
Now I just let her disseminate incorrect info to others as long at it won't be harmful and wait for it to come back and bite. If it doesn't, I figure no harm done and I avoided another black mark. If it does come back to bite and she says anything I won't be able to say " Well I knew you were wrong but you don't want me to correct you" because that will just be a different black mark.
Sometimes you just can't win, and it's smarter to not try - ever.
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Several of my wife's young cousins reached marrying age during the early part of our marriage. I told them I knew two magic words that would take a lot of the strife and heartache out of their marriage: "Yes, dear." Some of them, however, didn't take the advice and are on their second marriages.
moke123
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Never had a fight with the wife that wasn't over within minutes but the one phrase that would set her off was "Yes Dear"
NauticalGent
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You're supposed to say it with WITHOUT the generous layer of sarcasm...amateur....
moke123
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Usually I could only think it before I'd get the "Dont even say it."
