First, thank you for taking your part in this crisis. People need all the help they can get once that nastiness hits their lungs.
Second, from a TV show that my wife and I often watch (
NCIS), there was a line that might be helpful. "If you are going through Hell, keep going." When questioned about that line, Agent Gibbs explains "Don't stop to sight-see. Just keep on going."
As distressing as the COVID news can sometimes get, there is a principle that health-related workers are often told. You have to try very hard to avoid becoming personally involved.
Remember, it is the very nature of any healthcare job that you see people in distress. Even if you are not directly in a care ward but rather only work behind the scenes, you will see people in medical distress because hospitals are where they go when medically distressed.
You ARE going to be bombarded with tragedy all around you. Doctors and nurses in these settings often burn out because it is contrary to human nature to totally ignore someone's pain. However, the only way these people will get better is when their medical help sidesteps their pain in order to do the right thing (medically speaking) for each patient. In times of high demand, the emotion of personal compassion for individual patients distracts you and makes you less available for others who may equally need you.
You have to be able to step away and move on, hence my "keep going" advice. Staying and dwelling too long with one person makes you very compassionate - but it is NOT so compassionate for the others who have the same need.
What does this have to do with you? Even if you are not directly involved in hands-on health-care services, you are helping others by performing a type of support service that will help decision-makers somewhere. When you see horrible news, you have to learn to be a turtle and let that news bounce off of you. Otherwise, you will be unable to do your job. The key is thus to focus on the good that you CAN do and not dwell on things you CANNOT do - whether because it's not your job or because of the sheer volume of effort.
Despair is a bastard that cannot be allowed to take you over. It leads to a descending spiral that can paralyze you. I have been in such a cycle when my mother was dying slowly and there was no cure for what was taking her away. The therapy that I got helped me to find a useful way to look at things. While I'm not religious, the "Serenity" prayer is good advice. I will paraphrase it.
Learn to handle the things you can handle. Learn to let go of things you cannot handle. Learn how to tell the difference.
@harpygaggle my friend, I hope you soon can learn the difference. I don't doubt you have heard some form of this saying before. But it is not enough to just hear it. You have to feel it, to take it in as part of yourself. When you make the advice real for yourself, real enough to actually implement it on a regular basis, then you can reach a form of serenity. And I hope my advice helps.