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You are a bunch of sheep, all you can do is bleat, "BAAAD, BAAAD" as an all-too-predicatable reaction to my posts. I make no apology for being young and wild. The forums were in a state of stagnation when I arrived here and I infused them with new life, my life, my jizzom. Does that make me a...

Galaxiom fell into a cunning trap I laid for him! See my thread "F**k other devs" in the Watercooler section!

Ya bunch of wankers! :p

Here ya go!

You guys, you guys! Come and see Galaxiom make an UTTER fool of himself! It's VERY funny... ahhahahahahahah! :D :D :D

Hi guys, I'm ba-ack! I didn't mean to upset Uncle Gizmo. Dear old Uncle, I''m sorry. Perhaps you just need to learn to live in a world with people as spiteful and "bigoted" as me. I'm not craving attention, I come here to learn lessons. That's what life's all about, isn't it? Doc-Man, I didn't...

Now THERE's an interesting point. However, women are getting harder to date, at least in my corner of the globe, due to a rise in feminist schools of thought and a general aversion to intimacy. I believe that this is tied in with the rise in "Gay" pride. Correct me if you think I'm wrong. I...

Sorry mate. No one click that link, ok? I've been copping some stick from the mods on these other forums (NoFap, if anyone's heard of the site), and I'm pushing them to their very limits of tolerance. It seems like I'm gone beyond annoyingly persistent and brutally confrontational to being...

This is an outstanding link, a brilliant exposé of OOP and the principles behind it. I don't know who posted the WithEvents link, but that one is even more awesome. Geez, I feel like a kid in a candy store, only the candy is programming concepts, and my brain--which assimilates them--is...

Thanks for the info mate.

Has anyone bought this software: "Total Access Analyzer" by FMS, Inc.? http://www.fmsinc.com/microsoftaccess/bestpractices.html What does it do? Is it helpful for someone designing (relatively) small databases with not much VBA code therein? Thanks guys, - LC.

"Did you hear about the movie, 'Constipated'?" "No..." "That's because it hasn't come out yet!"

That's interesting. Yes, I liked my trig, especially within the context of the calculus. In what ways have you utilised this field of Maths in database design, if any?

It does make a lot of sense. I'm going to pin my inflated list of expenses on my client and make him pay for my new domain name, web hosting and AU$200 in IT books I've bought since the outset of this project. I think that AU$400 or so is quite reasonable, considering how much work I've put into...

Right, right. You seem to have gained a wealth of practical experience in your career. Mine's only just begun! (I've had jobs before, and good ones, but never a career until quite recently.) See, I was curious about the mathematical component of Access because my client wants a running total of...

I see, that's interesting. I thought it was strange that you called it geometry. We just call it Maths (with the "s" at the end) in Australia, and geometry and trig are always two separate units, despite being related in terms of practical application. I haven't had occasion to use much maths...

English was obviously not his forté. I could say something nasty, but I won't. Instead I will point out that he spelled it more or less phonetically, and orthography/phonetics are a massive barrier for non-native English speakers. I'm planning to emigrate to Poland if and when I strike it rich...

Hahaha. More about trolls in my new thread here: https://www.access-programmers.co.uk/forums/showpost.php?p=1559841&postcount=1

Trigonometry, I think you mean, Doc_Man. Arctangent is an inverse trigonometric function, and the Watercooler can't be one of those without defying the laws of nature. Aha! It's a *magic* watercooler, like Dr. Who and his TARDIS! What a fascinating and surreal place to find myself in...

So you want me to analyse myself? Let's see... what were your criteria again? 1. No 2. No 3. No 4. Yes 5. Yes Looks like I fit some of the criteria! BUT, let me tell you a few more things about myself that will probably wipe out any notion that I could possibly be a troll. 1. I am...