Notice to All Employees

[Joe8915]

This says it all

As of November 5, 2008, when President Obama is officially elected into office, our company will instill a few new policies which are in
keeping with his new, inspiring issues of change and fairness:

1.) All salespeople will be pooling their sales and bonuses into a
common pool that will be divided equally between all of you. This will
serve to give those of you who are underachieving a “fair shake.”

2.) All low level workers will be pooling their wages, including
overtime, into a common pool, dividing it equally amongst yourselves.
This will help those who are “too busy for overtime” to reap the
rewards from those who have more spare time and can work extra hours.

3.) All top management will now be referred to as “the government.”
We will not participate in this “pooling” experience because the law
doesn't apply to us.

4.) The “government” will give eloquent speeches to all employees
every week, encouraging it's workers to continue to work hard “for the
good of all.”

5.) The employees will be thrilled with these new policies because
it's “good to spread the wealth.” Those of you who have underachieved
will finally get an opportunity; those of you who have worked hard and
had success will feel more “patriotic.”

6.) The last few people who were hired should clean out their desks.
Don't feel bad, though, because President Obama will give you free
healthcare, free handouts, free oil for heating your home, free
foodstamps, and he'll let you stay in your home for as long as you want
even if you can't pay your mortgage. If you appeal directly to our
democratic congress, you might even get a free flatscreen TV and a
coupon for free haircuts (shouldn't all Americans be entitled to nice
looking hair?) !!!

If for any reason you are not happy with the new policies, you may
want to rethink your vote on November 4th.

 

[dkinley]

I thought the one I read the other day was pretty funny ...

Today on my way to lunch I passed a bum, or "homeless" for the politically correct. The sign he was holding read 'Vote Obama, I need the money.' I laughed.

Once in the restaurant my waiter had on a 'Obama 08' button. When the bill came I decided not to tip the waiter and explained to him that I was exploring the Obama redistribution of wealth concept. He stood there in disbelief while I told him that I was going to redistribute his tip to someone who I deemed more in need--the bum out on the corner (or as i like to call them, the "Urban Outdoorsman"). The server angrily walked off.

I went outside, gave the bum the $10 and told him to thank the waiter inside as I've decided he could use the money more. The bum was grateful.

At the end of my rather unscientific redistribution experiment I realized the bum was grateful for the money he did not earn, but the waiter was pretty angry that I gave away the money he did earn even though the actual recipient deserved money more.

I guess redistribution of wealth is an easier thing to swallow in concept than in practical application.

 

[statsman]

As opposed to McCain being elected.

All hourly workers will be required to join the Guard or the Reserves so you can serve in Afganistan or Iraq. As required by law, we will hold your job open for 30 days. Of course the minimum tour of duty in 90 days.

All salaried employees are exempt. After all, if we're salaried we must be more important and we probably voted Repubican.

 

[Rich]

I thought the one I read the other day was pretty funny ...

Today on my way to lunch I passed a bum, or "homeless" for the politically correct. The sign he was holding read 'Vote Obama, I need the money.' I laughed.

Once in the restaurant my waiter had on a 'Obama 08' button. When the bill came I decided not to tip the waiter and explained to him that I was exploring the Obama redistribution of wealth concept. He stood there in disbelief while I told him that I was going to redistribute his tip to someone who I deemed more in need--the bum out on the corner (or as i like to call them, the "Urban Outdoorsman"). The server angrily walked off.

I went outside, gave the bum the $10 and told him to thank the waiter inside as I've decided he could use the money more. The bum was grateful.

At the end of my rather unscientific redistribution experiment I realized the bum was grateful for the money he did not earn, but the waiter was pretty angry that I gave away the money he did earn even though the actual recipient deserved money more.

I guess redistribution of wealth is an easier thing to swallow in concept than in practical application.

The waiter gets paid a wage anyway, what is the point you're trying to make, that the waiter should be paid twice?

 

[Rabbie]

This says it all

As of November 5, 2008, when President Obama is officially elected into office, our company will instill a few new policies which are in
keeping with his new, inspiring issues of change and fairness:

I thought the new president doesn't take office until the iauguration in January

 

[chergh]

I thought the new president doesn't take office until the iauguration in January

When have the republicans ever given a damn about facts. Much better to make something up.

 

[Brianwarnock]

At the end of my rather unscientific redistribution experiment I realized the bum was grateful for the money he did not earn, but the waiter was pretty angry that I gave away the money he did earn even though the actual recipient deserved money more.

.

Surely he did not deserve it more, but he probably needed it more, then maybe not. Pretty dumb episode.

Brian

 

[Mike375]

The waiter gets paid a wage anyway, what is the point you're trying to make, that the waiter should be paid twice?

But the tips are seen by the waiter as part of his wage. The tips mean his true earnings are higher than the stated wage.

 

[MSAccessRookie]

The waiter gets paid a wage anyway, what is the point you're trying to make, that the waiter should be paid twice?

Rich,

I am positive that you are intelligent and very well informed, but in case you are unaware, although the waiter gets paid a wage, the law does not require that it even be at a mimimum wage level. Most of the Waitresses that I know get paid $5.00/Hr + Tips (Minimum Wage is over $7.00/Hr now), and the local Bartenders get 6.00-7.00+Tips. The expectation is that they will make over $10.00/hr average in Tips. This is part of what makes that joke so ironic.

 

[Joe8915]

I thought the one I read the other day was pretty funny ...

Today on my way to lunch I passed a bum, or "homeless" for the politically correct. The sign he was holding read 'Vote Obama, I need the money.' I laughed.

Once in the restaurant my waiter had on a 'Obama 08' button. When the bill came I decided not to tip the waiter and explained to him that I was exploring the Obama redistribution of wealth concept. He stood there in disbelief while I told him that I was going to redistribute his tip to someone who I deemed more in need--the bum out on the corner (or as i like to call them, the "Urban Outdoorsman"). The server angrily walked off.

I went outside, gave the bum the $10 and told him to thank the waiter inside as I've decided he could use the money more. The bum was grateful.

At the end of my rather unscientific redistribution experiment I realized the bum was grateful for the money he did not earn, but the waiter was pretty angry that I gave away the money he did earn even though the actual recipient deserved money more.

I guess redistribution of wealth is an easier thing to swallow in concept than in practical application.

I am still on the floor cracking up laughing. That was great.

 

[Alisa]

Not to rain on your little rhetorical parade, but I can't resist interjecting just ONE fact:
The average waiter or waitress makes about 50k per year. A single person with no dependents earning that salary would get a tax cut of $500 under Obama, and would receive NO tax cut under McCain. Niether Obama OR McCain's tax policies affect anyone who doesn't work for a living, i.e., homeless people.

So I think you ought to repeat your experiment. Go back, get your 10 bucks back from the homeless guy (just tell him you made an honest mistake, I am sure he will understand - it happens to everyone that doesn't look at facts). Then go give it to the waitress and apologize for being an asshole.

 

[Mike375]

The average waiter or waitress makes about 50k per year. A single person with no dependents earning that salary would get a tax cut of $500 under Obama, and would receive NO tax cut under McCain.

Where does the $500 tax come from? Is it paid for by extra tax on high earners or by reducing gov't services? If it comes from the high earner then that will be passed on to the low earner. If a cut in gov't provided service then that hits the low earner.

Or perhaps the $500 comes from thin air

 

[Rich]

Where does the $500 tax come from?

Savings made but cutting back on the paranoia driven war machine

 

[Mike375]

Savings made but cutting back on the paranoia driven war machine

But that money goes to workers in defence and related.

 

[Joe8915]

Not to rain on your little rhetorical parade, but I can't resist interjecting just ONE fact:
The average waiter or waitress makes about 50k per year. A single person with no dependents earning that salary would get a tax cut of $500 under Obama, and would receive NO tax cut under McCain. Niether Obama OR McCain's tax policies affect anyone who doesn't work for a living, i.e., homeless people.

So I think you ought to repeat your experiment. Go back, get your 10 bucks back from the homeless guy (just tell him you made an honest mistake, I am sure he will understand - it happens to everyone that doesn't look at facts). Then go give it to the waitress and apologize for being an asshole.

At how much a year:????

I found this at Bureau of Labor Statistics. Now maybe I am wrong.

Gee, I did

 

[Alisa]

At how much a year:????

I found this at Bureau of Labor Statistics. Now maybe I am wrong.

Gee, I did

It depends how you define Waiter, but if we use your numbers, which is fine with me, that makes dk even more of an asshole. $10 is a lot of money to someone working so hard for so little. And by the way, the waiter making $20,000 will STILL get a $500 tax cut under Obama, and NOTHING under McCain.

 

[georgedwilkinson]

I can't resist interjecting just ONE fact:
The average waiter or waitress makes about 50k per year.

I think the waitresses in places where they don't wear much might make near that per year, but those are the kinds of places that nice Democrats work at. Otherwise, I don't think it is a "fact" per se.

 

[dkinley]

It depends how you define Waiter, but if we use your numbers, which is fine with me, that makes dk even more of an asshole. $10 is a lot of money to someone working so hard for so little. And by the way, the waiter making $20,000 will STILL get a $500 tax cut under Obama, and NOTHING under McCain.

A) I didn't say I did it. I said I read it and thought I liked it as a nice analogy. You're the one that passed a brick over it.

B) I have to disagree with the labor statistics because I have bartended and that falls under that category. I can say, without a doubt, that everyone in my bar and those I knew in the industry never disclosed 100% of their earnings to avoid said taxes. Since the hourly wage was under the minimum (tips class), how many only claimed the minimum to pull that average down? This is so rampant now, that some establishments declare the tip earnings as well.

C) In some cities, there are servers that pull down 80K easy. In larger cities, being a server is a career choice because it can provide steady and high income.

D) I don't mind helping provide opportunity, but I don't see it as my job to provide success - I've got enough problems of my own and trying to succeed without worrying about or paying for someone elses.

E) As far as being an asshole, you know nothing about me, but I appreciate the compliment. I bet you would pass another brick if I told you that I formed and run a non-profit organization that gets pork-barrelled grants for the community and state in addition to the other things that I do. If the Feds and the State are going to hand it out, I would be an idiot for not grabbing after, putting it to use in my community to try and better it. Probably call me a liar, but so be it, it's your opinion and you are entitled to it. It just makes you sound stupid when you inject your opinion and claim it as fact because it's backed up by whatever left-wing crap that you have swallowed for lack of a better diet.

F) If you are going to talk taxes, please get clue'd in and differentiate between personal and corporate. Don't try and push your agenda on me especially since when I know the difference and have plenty of experience in these areas. If you are going to talk marginal, please define if it's the classic state & fed marginal, the fed marginal, or the different slices combined with consumption marginal. Whatever it is you read and regurgitate here claiming as fact, could be or could be not depending on accounting methodology.

G) Reply if you want. I would listen more attentively but all you do is attack, smear, and attack again with lies or distortion. If didn't sound so outlandish, you might get an honest reply. You aren't as open-minded as you claim and I am done wasting my time. The light will come on for you eventually.

H) So grind your axe on someone who cares to waste their time. No, you haven't won, because you sure as hell haven't gotten my vote. If anything, you pushed it further away by attempting to shove the Obama/Democrat philosophy down my throat like a religious zealot at an airport. Go and jump off that cliff since everyone else is, I will maintain my constancy of purpose not what someone on a political pulpit is spewing out telling me, wait - ordering me, what my purpose is. My purpose is life, liberty, and pursuit of happiness as stated in the Declaration. If someone doesn't feel like pursuing it, I feel that it's not the Government's job to give it to them - plain and simple.

I) Since you are an Atheist then there must be no purpose in or for life. If that is so, then why do you care? You are here, then you are gone - there is nothing after. In respect, I understand where you are coming from that you want economic justice, but if there is no purpose in any, then why care?

-dK

 

[Alisa]

Wow your head really exploded on that one. I guess I touched a nerve. Whether you are the one who actually did it or not, only an asshole would think that is funny. Tell it to redneckgeek - he will think it is funny just like setting people on fire.

The one thing that stood out to me in your rant was this:

I will maintain my constancy of purpose not what someone on a political pulpit is spewing out telling me

So tell me, which John McCain are you voting for? The one who opposed the Bush tax cuts because they benefited the wealthy at the expense of the middle class? Or the John McCain that wants to make those tax cuts permanent because trickle down economic theory worked out so well?

You can call me close minded, atheistic, or whatever you please, but that doesn't change the fact that the tax burden in this country is unfairly distributed. If you wanted to know about that 2% figure, by the way, you can find it by reading this document: http://www.treas.gov/press/releases/reports/07230 r.pdf
It's actually a very interesting read.

It might shock you to find that MY purpose is life, liberty, and pursuit of happiness as well. No heaven or hell required, but that is a topic for another thread. I don't want the government to give me anything. I want to pay my fair share. And I want everyone else to pay their fair share too. I don't see what is so horrible about that.

 

[Joe8915]

Wow, dk

Didn't know she was a Atheist to !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Amen brother