What's your best/worst joke? (1 Viewer)

[Uncle Gizmo]

Ain't it the truth!

https://twitter.com/x/status/1922410894451212580

 

[CJ_London]

Ain't it the truth!

looks like the truth has been banned....

 

[Uncle Gizmo]

What did you say?

 

[Uncle Gizmo]

https://twitter.com/x/status/1926317696213225529

 

[Isaac]

 

[Cotswold]

Not too bad!

 

[The_Doc_Man]

Not too bad!

I've been known to answer the "how are you" question with "somehow surviving." Not too bad?

 

[NauticalGent]

Not too bad!

Hilarious!

 

[Cotswold]

I've been known to answer the "how are you" question with "somehow surviving." Not too bad?

If you were from Lancashire and parts of Yorkshire, you may get "fair to middlin' " and in some places "yeah........fine"

Of course the answer nobody wants is "well as you asked....." followed by a parade of illnesses, or disasters.
In which case you just stand there shifting from one foot to the other, hoping that the ground beneath you will open and swallow you up. disappear.

 

[The_Doc_Man]

I had a cousin who, before she died, was clearly the wrong person for the "how are you" question. Her health wasn't that good because she smoked and had emphysema - for real... but THEN she was also a hypochondriac. When she answered that question, it was always in a wheezy, whiny voice and she enumerated huge numbers of ailments. It was bad enough that you would wish for something described in The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy regarding Vogon poetry. The poetry was SO bad that your entrails would spontaneously burst from your abdomen and strangle you to death as an act of mercy.

 

[Uncle Gizmo]

It's always better to compromise, you never know what the other person knows!

 

[Uncle Gizmo]

you may get "fair to middlin' "

One of the best local expressions I ever heard was 'God Christ Ah'

I asked chatty about it, and chatty said:-

The expression **"God Christ Ah"** is noted as a local exclamation, particularly associated with the Wiltshire dialect in England, as mentioned in sources like Urban Dictionary. It’s typically used to express surprise, frustration, annoyance, or shock, similar to other interjections like "Oh my God!" or "Jesus Christ!" The phrase combines references to "God" and "Christ" with "Ah," which adds an emphatic or emotional tone, often reflecting the speaker’s immediate reaction to a situation.

- **Context and Usage**:
- In Wiltshire, England, this expression is described as a colorful way to convey strong emotions, akin to saying "Fuck me!" or "Shit!" in moments of surprise or irritation. It’s a dialect-specific phrase that carries a sense of local flavor and is likely used informally among speakers familiar with the regional vernacular.
- For example, someone might say "God Christ Ah!" after narrowly avoiding an accident or hearing unexpected news, emphasizing the intensity of the moment.

- **Linguistic Breakdown**:
- **"God" and "Christ"**: These are invocations of divine names, commonly used in English-speaking cultures as exclamations. Using "Christ" in such phrases can be seen as mildly blasphemous in religious contexts, though it’s often secular in casual speech.
- **"Ah"**: This is an interjection that amplifies the expression, adding a drawn-out, emotive sound. As noted in sources like Wiktionary, "Ah" can convey a range of feelings—surprise, relief, or frustration—depending on tone and context. In this case, it likely serves to punctuate the phrase with a dramatic flair.

- **Cultural Notes**:
- The phrase’s inclusion in Wiltshire dialect suggests it’s rooted in local speech patterns, possibly among working-class or rural communities where expressive, unfiltered language is common.
- While not widespread, it’s a vivid example of how regional dialects create unique expressions that blend religious references with emotional outbursts.

- **Comparison to Similar Expressions**:
- It’s similar to "Jesus H. Christ!" in American English, which is used for surprise or frustration, with the "H" adding a humorous or emphatic twist (possibly from the Greek monogram for Jesus, IHS). Likewise, "God Christ Ah" uses "Ah" to achieve a similar effect.
- In British English, you might hear "Bloody hell!" or "Christ Almighty!" in comparable situations, but "God Christ Ah" stands out for its distinct regional character.

 

[The_Doc_Man]

- It’s similar to "Jesus H. Christ!" in American English, which is used for surprise or frustration, with the "H" adding a humorous or emphatic twist (possibly from the Greek monogram for Jesus, IHS).

In the USA, as noted by Uncle G., you WILL sometimes hear "Jesus H. Christ" - said vehemently as an exclamation and swear-word at the same time. But if you ask, it has nothing to do with "IHS" (Latin acronym for Iesus Hominem Salvator). You find out that the "H" stands for "Hallmark - when you care enough to send the very best."

 

[Isaac]

In the USA, as noted by Uncle G., you WILL sometimes hear "Jesus H. Christ" - said vehemently as an exclamation and swear-word at the same time. But if you ask, it has nothing to do with "IHS" (Latin acronym for Iesus Hominem Salvator). You find out that the "H" stands for "Hallmark - when you care enough to send the very best."

Never heard that one before