Why most assholes are men (1 Viewer)

The_Doc_Man

Happy Retired Curmudgeon
At least part of that talk made sense to me. When Dad passed, Mom was beginning to spiral downwards into the abyss of Alzheimer's Disease. I shouldered the burden of becoming my mother's caregiver. After she was gone, it took a while but I came out of the funk. After it was all done, I used to tell people "At least I can look at myself in the mirror and not flinch." Because for five years I had purpose and I performed that duty to its most bitter finale. I often told people (and still do) that my father gave me the toughest - but also the best - lesson on responsibility. He did so by dying and leaving my mother in need of care that only a family member would or could give.

Which in a way also explains my success with the Navy, since my position required someone willing to take a load of responsibility for a computer that was used to manage the lives of tens of thousands of Navy reservists. That machine HAD to be kept ready at all times, and as a result, I was on a 7x24 schedule of availability. Apparently they recognized my sense of responsibility.
 

Uncle Gizmo

Nifty Access Guy
Staff member
That's the essence of it Richard, >>>"I shouldered the burden"<<< --- It's very easy to blame everything and everyone for your troubles and woes. On the other hand it's very difficult to shoulder the burden. Mind you, what is the alternative? If you don't shoulder the burden, then nothing happens, well not quite as easy as that! "Nothing happening" usually means you are spiralling into the Abyss. And it's a bottomless Abyss in the sense that you don't think things can get worse, but they do! In other words "nothing happening" means everything deteriorates.
 

NauticalGent

Pristine Curmudgeon
This guy’s idea is lost on my son-in-law; that low life shoulders NO responsibility and self respect...runs from it in fact.
 

The_Doc_Man

Happy Retired Curmudgeon
It's off topic so I apologize ahead of time, but it is a characteristic of the phenomenon known as "deadbeat dads." And also the "wham, bam, thank you, ma'am" (a.k.a. "love 'em and leave 'em" types) who place women in the position of facing pregnancy and childbirth alone. Total failure to shoulder responsibility.
 

The_Doc_Man

Happy Retired Curmudgeon
The book "Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus" highlights the fact that we don't think the same way. But it is possible that this difference in thought patterns stems from structural brain differences.

The search I will describe is actually one I use for discussing homosexuality but some of the findings apply to this thread. Do a general web search for "Homosexuality + brain scan" and then look at some 1990s articles in UK medical journals regarding the use of Positron Emission Tomography (P.E.T. scans).

The part that is relevant to this discussion is that men and women have structurally different brains. There really IS such a thing as a "man's brain" or a "woman's brain." If the "hardware" of the brain is different, it would not be a particular stretch to suggest that at least some differences in thought patterns might emerge due to that evolutionary difference. No, don't ask me why it is so. I'm not an anthropologist.

The side reference to politicians liking verbal conflict reminds me of what my country aunt used to call "neuro-opto-rectitis". Perhaps one of these days we will re-discover that special neural link between the optic nerve and the anus, the one that gives people a crappy viewpoint. Or perhaps it is just that politicians spew so much verbal crap that they are compensating for atrophy of that particular nerve. (Yeah, I know I'm being unkind...).

But the brain scan difference is NOT a joke. It is very real. And consider homosexuals for a moment, people for whom the brain and body are not quite consistent. So gay men often tend to be nurturing and conciliatory while gay women are often angry assholes with tons of attitude.
 

vba_php

Software Engineer
The part that is relevant to this discussion is that men and women have structurally different brains. There really IS such a thing as a "man's brain" or a "woman's brain." If the "hardware" of the brain is different, it would not be a particular stretch to suggest that at least some differences in thought patterns might emerge due to that evolutionary difference.
i was unaware of this. i might just look that up. But God could have been a bit more cooperative and given us women that were NOT so damn complicated and indecisive!
 

The_Doc_Man

Happy Retired Curmudgeon
The testosterone vs. estrogen issue more often affects physical characteristics. Besides which, it is hard to separate cause and effect. However, never forget for a moment that the BRAIN is the most powerful sex organ. What the brain says to do, the body does. And that applies to sexual preference as well as being argumentative or conciliatory.
 

vba_php

Software Engineer
The testosterone vs. estrogen issue more often affects physical characteristics. Besides which, it is hard to separate cause and effect. However, never forget for a moment that the BRAIN is the most powerful sex organ. What the brain says to do, the body does. And that applies to sexual preference as well as being argumentative or conciliatory.
I spose ur rite mr grandpa! 😀 uve got much more life experience than i do!
 

ColinEssex

Old registered user
Well I'm still trying to get over the fact that we have women bus drivers here. Actually, they're not too bad but parallel parking at bus stops is a bit iffy.

Col
 

The_Doc_Man

Happy Retired Curmudgeon
there will be women priests in the catholic church.
Pardon me if I choose to not hold my breath waiting for that one. While I'm not saying it would be impossible, I sincerely doubt it would be soon. At age 71, I'm not sure I would live long enough for that one. BUT it ain't a bad idea.
 

vba_php

Software Engineer
Allowing married priests would have a positive impact on the church also.
Isn't the catholic church the only church in the world that prohibits it's leaders from being married?

Pardon me if I choose to not hold my breath waiting for that one. While I'm not saying it would be impossible, I sincerely doubt it would be soon.
I don't believe pope francis supports the idea of women serving as priests. But there is plenty of support for it, just as there is a big push to allow gays into the church as well. And if I'm not mistaken, I believe the bible actually states that Christ is the head of the church, followed by the men as the leaders, and then the women. I'm not sure where it's at in the book but I'm almost positive I read about that.

But, getting back on the topic of this thread, hey Uncle Gizmo, do you believe that big business people who live in big cities like NYC (for instance, Donald Trump) have to act like assholes at least once in a while to make it in business in those ruthless cut-throat places of the world? I would think it would be necessary, in order to push through all the competition. I would seriously doubt that people like Bill Gates or Warren Buffet have *always* been sweethearts over the course of their careers, especially when they were growing their businesses.
 
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Uncle Gizmo

Nifty Access Guy
Staff member
Uncle Gizmo, do you believe that big business people who live in big cities like NYC (for instance, Donald Trump) have to act like assholes
Looking at a simpler and more common experience, most of us drive I should imagine. We have all seen unsavoury behaviour and I'm reasonably sure we have all been involved in unsavoury behaviour at some time. What happens to you when you lose that control, when you lose your temper, when you get to the point in your driving where you could actually harm someone?

It simply shouldn't happen, you are driving a dangerous vehicle which can inflict major harm and possibly death on innocent people, and yourself of course. What makes you you do something so utterly stupid?

Thinking about it it's usually that you have had a series of transgressions against yourself, somebody pulled out in front of you, somebody didn't indicate, somebody was driving too slowly, and all these things happen over a series of days or weeks, and then eventually some poor sod does something and Wham you are triggered.

Now you mentioned the bosses and business, The bosses just ordinary people like you and me they may well have had some luck, they may well be gifted in some area, but they are subject to the same emotions and stresses and things that we all are. I'm sure they have people working for them that irritate them, and I'm sure they irritate some of the people around them.

I would guess that their success comes from a lot of hard work, and a reasonable amount of luck and being in the right place at the right time. I doubt very much if being an ass-hole is an indication of success, although I have had run-ins with bosses who were Asshole's.
 

vba_php

Software Engineer
I doubt very much if being an ass-hole is an indication of success, although I have had run-ins with bosses who were Asshole's.
I think it's more common than we realize. But the term "asshole" can refer to many personalities I think. Look at Larry Ellison of Oracle. I don't think he's very much of a nice guy. And then there's Steve Jobs, who was said to have ruled Apple with an Iron Hand. And from everything I've read in the news about leading Wall Street firms in NYC, most of the leaders of those companies can lose their tempers at times. An exception to that rule would prolly be Jamie Dimon, the CEO of JP Morgan Chase. He always displays a cooperative and personable attitude.
 

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