Cyber bullying - fact or fiction? (1 Viewer)

[ColinEssex]

There has been quite a bit in the papers about cyber bullying - bullying by computer messages or phone texts etc.

Some youngsters claim this is widespread, some have even been driven to attempt suicide. Apparently, some weak adults succumb to running to police and generally over-reacting.

Is this phenomenon actually as bad as it seems? Or is it just weak people making a fuss to gain attention. Why do people take things so seriously? Surely it's just harmless fun.

Anyone experienced this at all?

Col

 

[kevlray]

I have never experienced it, but I have read a number of articles on it. Part of the issue that I see is that a number of children seem to live by the social media (facebook, myspace, etc.). Once they start getting bullied, they don't get off the computer or change their ID or ask for help.

I was bullied a lot in school, it was very unpleasant experience. I could not avoid the bullies (98 pound weakling, red curly hair, glasses, deaf in one ear and a geek. I was an easy target)

 

[ColinEssex]

You mean outside of AWF?

If Facebook etc. is the equivalent of the Pacific Ocean then AWF is an insignificant puddle on the shore. Of course I mean outside AWF.

I don't know what you're driving at.

Col

 

[Brianwarnock]

I've never thought of col as a bully, a pain in the a&&e at times yes, but not a bully, however his response to your simple question suggests a guilty conscience .

Brian

 

[Brianwarnock]

I am in agreement with kevlray, however I am in my seventies not my teens and cannot put myself into that mindset.

Brian

 

[dan-cat]

Apparently, some weak adults succumb to running to police and generally over-reacting.

Perhaps if you'd elucidate on what these 'weak adults' are succumbing to then we could make a fairer assessment as to whether it is bullying or not.

 

[ColinEssex]

Perhaps if you'd elucidate on what these 'weak adults' are succumbing to then we could make a fairer assessment as to whether it is bullying or not.

When I was in school in the early 60's, it was perfectly normal for anyone who was "different" to be bullied, and beaten up. It could be because they wore glasses or had ginger hair or was short - it could be anything.

I'm not saying it was right, but it happened as the norm. In other words it was physical abuse but at that time was just part of school life. And that was just what the teachers did, the other kids were not quite so brutal.

Nowadays, it is all done by text, email, social sites, chat rooms etc. messages suggesting they commit suicide, or self harm or intimidation, yet, it gets a lot of press and TV coverage. Surely all you have to do it accept it as a laugh. Some youngsters kill themselves! Why? Surely a bit of harmless banter is ok. In other words, if you don't like it, ignore it.

I think people are too sensitive, everything these days has to be PC, you can't say boo to a child without them screaming sexual harassment.

People need to lighten up or we won't be able to walk down the street without being arrested for harming the paving stones.

As for the example Accessblaster keeps wittering on about. At that time there was a big thing in the UK about these do gooders having a nice holiday for free and keeping most of the money people generously give. That's why they decide to go to these exotic places.
I think I may go to the Seychelles for a sponsored walk around. All in aid of charity of course.
I disagree with scrounging money from sites like this, most people give privately to charities close to their heart for whatever reason. We get harassed in the street to give money to charity, surely a site like this should not be allowing money scroungers here.

I bow to accessblaster's superior knowledge on bullying, I'm afraid I am not that familiar with it. Is there a difference these days between bullying and harassment?

Col

 

[ColinEssex]

Your above diatribe has nothing to do with tinyevil. This man was doing good work and you went off on him. If I had to guess it was racial or cultural. I based that on the pejorative you hurled at him. His only crime was that he caught your attention.

This thread is about current issues centred around cyber bullying, not some old thread over a year old.

Try to address the issue and not derail things. I've noticed this is a habit you seem to enjoy.

Col

 

[dan-cat]

When I was in school in the early 60's, it was perfectly normal for anyone who was "different" to be bullied, and beaten up. It could be because they wore glasses or had ginger hair or was short - it could be anything.

I'm not saying it was right, but it happened as the norm. In other words it was physical abuse but at that time was just part of school life. And that was just what the teachers did, the other kids were not quite so brutal.

I get what you're saying but isn't that what life is about? To try and fix stuff that isn't "right"?

Nowadays, it is all done by text, email, social sites, chat rooms etc. messages suggesting they commit suicide, or self harm or intimidation, yet, it gets a lot of press and TV coverage. Surely all you have to do it accept it as a laugh. Some youngsters kill themselves! Why? Surely a bit of harmless banter is ok. In other words, if you don't like it, ignore it.

A couple of things here:

I think a lot of communication is lost on the internets. For example most of your humor Col, is lost on people here because we can't see your face when you're talking. Some don't understand 'wry' humor at all but those who do would pick up on it if we were all in the same room. So if someone texts "go die in a fire", you have no opportunity to gauge how serious they are and if you're of a nervous temperament you will likely jump to the worst conclusions.

Second, now being a retired manager of hospital staff, I'm sure you don't really think expecting everyone to react to stress in the same way is at all realistic.

I think people are too sensitive, everything these days has to be PC, you can't say boo to a child without them screaming sexual harassment.

People need to lighten up or we won't be able to walk down the street without being arrested for harming the paving stones.

Well for me there needs to be a compromise. A humorless world is not worth living in. So yes people should be able to laugh at themselves more. However this shouldn't be at the expense of social responsibility.

For example there was a thread on here discussing a prank call on the Duchess of Cambridge resulting in the suicide of one of the hospital staff who forwarded the call. Many said that it was the nurse's problem for being so vulnerable. I disagreed simply because the prank caller should not have the right to behave in any way they want without fear of any consequence. They still have an obligation to behaving socially and if an anti-social action causes harm then they should face some form of consequence.

 

[Brianwarnock]

I think this is classic AWF Bullying. Kilimanjaro Trek - August 2012

Considering he has not posted again since the personal attack. Which BTW was outside the usual Politics or Watercooler arena.

When MODs call for decorum I have to laugh. It's a free for all and anything goes.

OK you got me on that one that was an attempt at bullying, I say attempt as Tiny got the better of Col and did indeed make him appear as an absolute prat, I'd throw a few other adjectives in for good measure.

Col you really let yourself down there.

Brian

 

[ColinEssex]

OK you got me on that one that was an attempt at bullying, I say attempt as Tiny got the better of Col and did indeed make him appear as an absolute prat, I'd throw a few other adjectives in for good measure.

Col you really let yourself down there.

Brian

C'est la vie. Can't win them all.

Still, it's nice that I keep you entertained. If I can do a bit to cheer people up then it's not all in vain.

Oh Accessblaster, who is the wise man who said that quote? I know you quoted Dickies post but he couldn't have thought of it.

Col

 

[Brianwarnock]

Not surprisingly you miss the point about bullying.
The man was minding his own business and got sucker punched. That's what bullies do.
Then others come along and make light of it. The fact that he defended himself extremely well is irrelevant. Everybody should fight back.

You talk about personal attacks, well I feel that this is despite my acknowledgement of a mistake.

Perhaps you would care to explain the bold bit.

Brian

 

[scott-atkinson]

I think the Bullying arena has changed and evolved, when I was at school in the 70's 80's I was bullied for being fat, and for having a speech impediment, I missed the last year of school due to it, and had to be home tutored.

I new who my bullies were, as they had to bully me face to face, as there was no other option, but when they had physically beat me they new when to stop...whereas in today's society, they can remain faceless behind a computer screen and not even see the person they are bullying, and of course do not know when to stop... that is why we get teenage suicides, driven to despair by a faceless menace who offers a relentless tirade of abuse...

Yes people are too sensitive these days, yes the PC brigade have driven the UK to almost Nanny status, but in my mind there is no room in society for Bullies...

Social media sites need to be more accountable for their content, if they cannot stop harassment in any form then the site should be shut down... imagine what that would do to Facebook's share price... I think they would site up and pay attention then..

I am also a great advocate for ISP's taking more responsibility also, they should filter out Porn content completely, and have that as an Opt in only, although I do not feel that Porn is the only reason we have Rapes and Child sex abuse, it is certainly a factor, and is absolutely a means of delivering content as such to eager eyes who are that way inclined...

Sex addiction to Porn in this country is a massive unreported problem, and that cannot be good for a healthy society...

Rant Over...

 

[ColinEssex]

Scott, I think your post is excellent. I am sorry you had a rough time at school.

There are two things I was wondering about.

a) does this cyber bullying happen in other countries like the USA, Japan or Canada for example?

And

b) as the bullying is not physical, as both you and I explained. Why do people take so much notice of it? Surely, if one doesn't like it, just ignore it, the bullies will soon get bored.

 

[scott-atkinson]

Scott, I think your post is excellent. I am sorry you had a rough time at school.

Thanks Buddy, kids can be cruel, but the bullying made me into a man, I don't take sh*t from anyone now

a) does this cyber bullying happen in other countries like the USA, Japan or Canada for example?

I can't speak for them, but would imagine that it does, it is all to easy to write something on the screen, sometimes in all innocence, that can be interpreted the wrong way by the recipient, that is the danger of faceless communication..

b) as the bullying is not physical, as both you and I explained. Why do people take so much notice of it? Surely, if one doesn't like it, just ignore it, the bullies will soon get bored.

I think one of the reasons for this is social structure, in this modern life, for many teenagers, the media life is their social life, it is hard to switch off... my two boys for example, aged 11 and 10, they play an online Game called Minecraft and Roblox, part of the game but not the main part is interaction with other users, my boys take it very serious when they get mentioned in a post, and get angry when it is negative... I tell them constantly just ignore it, which they do until the next negative comment from somebody else... social media is a massive part of children's lives these days, and they find it hard to switch off or distance themselves from criticism. We as adults can switch off, children don't...

I certainly do not want to curb free expression, that is our right as individuals, but I do believe that Social Media on the web should be accountable for the content on their sites. It is so easy to set up a profile on any site with the most minimal of information, you are faceless, nameless, and traceless, social media sites should not allow people access to the sites unless they can prove who they are, where they live, and how old they are...

Social media can so easily be used , and is being used as Grooming sites for young teenagers by older men and women simply because they have to provide very little information about themselves when they create a profile..

This site is the same, you have no idea who I am, my profile name is Scott-Atkinson, but I could be a women, I could be 5o years of age, or I could be 18 years of age, I say I am in the UK, but I could be anywhere.... I could even be your next door neighbor for all you know...

 

[ColinEssex]

Yes, I follow what you're saying Scott. The students we have in the summer are aged around 14 to 16 and are very much into Facebook.

Oh Accessblaster, there is no apostrophe in the word "keyboards" and "theses"?

Col

 

[Dick7Access]

I think this is classic AWF Bullying. Kilimanjaro Trek - August 2012

Considering he has not posted again since the personal attack. Which BTW was outside the usual Politics or Watercooler arena.

When MODs call for decorum I have to laugh. It's a free for all and anything goes.

Thanks for the link. It gave me a good laugh.
IMO,You can't be bullied on line. If 1000 people here say I am a wonderful guy, it doesn't make me a wonderful guy. If one person says I am a jerk, it doesn't make me a jerk. Now, I have been bullied face to face. Demanding I do something or face retribution, my standed answer is if you push this issue you are going to have to kill me, because I would rather be dead than put up with your demands. It's as always worked.

 

[Brianwarnock]

........
IMO,You can't be bullied on line. If 1000 people here say I am a wonderful guy, it doesn't make me a wonderful guy. If one person says I am a jerk, it doesn't make me a jerk. .

Whilst I agree with this as Accessblaster ,post 23, and I , post 7, have pointed out we are not teenagers.

Brian

 

[kevlray]

a) does this cyber bullying happen in other countries like the USA, Japan or Canada for example?

It definitely happens in the US. There were several several stories in the past few years of teens committing suicide because of cyber bullying. I do not know the details of the cyber bullying. But I gathered it was a number of people posting untrue statements about the person.

 

[ColinEssex]

Colon,

Once again you have managed to identify the most important element of this entire thread congratulations Sherlock.

Ok, here's some questions for you.

Why is ok for Americans to call the British "limey's"? Or Australians to call the English "poms"? Or Americans to be called "yanks"? Etc etc.

Yet you take exception to me calling the Welsh "taffy's". Is there a difference?

Col

Ps, what's the weather like on the moral high ground?