I'm sorry you don't see it that way.

How would you intepret that statement?

  • I apologize if I hurt your feelings.

    Votes: 3 17.6%
  • I wish we agreed on the matter.

    Votes: 8 47.1%
  • Other

    Votes: 6 35.3%

  • Total voters
    17

Kraj

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If you were engaged in conversation with a person where you disagreed and someone said this to you, how would you take it? Would you take it to mean it was an apology for any hurt feelings that person may have caused you? Or would you take it to mean that person regrets that you don't agree on the matter? Or would you take it another way?
 
Funny you should ask - I had a boss that I thankfully got away from, and she said that to me once. I had gotten my evaluation from her, and it was full of comments that had a negative ring to them. Not specifically negative, but could be read that way if you weren't really scrutinizing it, and so I took issue with many of the comments. I went over it all with a fine-tooth comb, and changed a lot of the wording. When we sat down and had it out, there were many instances where she couldn't understand why I was worried about the wording, but she changed some things. There was one issue, I can't really remember the specifics, but we did not agree on it, and she said " I'm sorry you see it that way" or something to that end. It was most definitely NOT an apology for hurting my feelings in any way.

In most cases, I would probably not think that this was an apologetic statement. How can I be apologizing for the way you feel, or the opinion you have? That makes no sense.

That's my $.02.

Lisa

Lisa
 
I would see it as a type of apology. One that is given and recieved. To me it implies that they may have been hurt at a comment made by you as well, and therefor expecting an apology in return.


IMHO
selena
 
I would take it like this.

You regret that my opinion differs from the opinion represented by the word "way".

I don't see where you can read an "apology for causing any hurt feelings" in to that statement. The object of the statement is an individual's opinion to a specific topic. The topic of "feelings" is not contained in the statement at all.
 
selenau837 said:
I would see it as a type of apology. One that is given and recieved. To me it implies that they may have been hurt at a comment made by you as well, and therefor expecting an apology in return.


IMHO
selena
Plus of course it would also depend on just what exactly that person was accused of in the first place and whether it was factually accurate
 
Rich said:
Plus of course it would also depend on just what exactly that person was accused of in the first place and whether it was factually accurate


Perhaps, but isn't this a hypotheticial situation?
 
Lisa's post reminded me of a third, very prevalent use of the phrase. I'm ok with it not being an option, though, since I prefer to focus on the positive in this case. But anyway, the phrase is often used to mean, "The fact that you don't see it my way means there is something wrong with you."
 
Kraj said:
Lisa's post reminded me of a third, very prevalent use of the phrase. I'm ok with it not being an option, though, since I prefer to focus on the positive in this case. But anyway, the phrase is often used to mean, "The fact that you don't see it my way means there is something wrong with you."

Yep - that's how I took it, too. And that is why I don't work for her anymore!!

Lisa
 
Kraj said:
Lisa's post reminded me of a third, very prevalent use of the phrase. I'm ok with it not being an option, though, since I prefer to focus on the positive in this case. But anyway, the phrase is often used to mean, "The fact that you don't see it my way means there is something wrong with you."


Hmmm, I am learning something new today.
 
I would think forming an opinion on whether it was meant to be an apology would almost always hinge on the situation and maybe more important, who exactly was saying it. Seeing how Rich said it and that it's as close as he will likely ever get to a proper apology, I'd be willing to take it as one :)
 
KenHigg said:
I would think forming an opinion on whether it was meant to be an apology would almost always hinge on the situation and maybe more important, who exactly was saying it. Seeing how Rich said it and that it's as close as he will likely ever get to a proper apology, I'd be willing to take it as one :)
Stand for what you believe to be right
 
KenHigg said:
I would think forming an opinion on whether it was meant to be an apology would almost always hinge on the situation and maybe more important, who exactly was saying it. Seeing how Rich said it and that it's as close as he will likely ever get to a proper apology, I'd be willing to take it as one :)

I thought this was a hypotheticial situation?

I've been out sick so I don't know what all is going on. I saw a huge discussion in a 'positive' thread, but only skimmed it and didn't read it.

Is this an offshoot of that thread??
 
selenau837 said:
Is this an offshoot of that thread??
Yes, and it's being driven by a lynch mob. :eek:
In any case the jury's biased and I'm going to have them dismissed and the trial moved
 
Rich said:
Yes, and it's being driven by a lynch mob. :eek:
In any case the jury's biased and I'm going to have them dismissed and the trial moved

I've never seen a jury at a lynching before :confused:
 
Rich said:
Yes, and it's being driven by a lynch mob. :eek:
In any case the jury's biased and I'm going to have them dismissed and the trial moved

Ohh, wow it became so big is spanned two threads? Wow!!!
Well Richy boy, good luck! I gotcha back....
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.WAYYYYY back here..*giggles* :D :eek: :eek: :eek:
 
selenau837 said:
I thought this was a hypotheticial situation?
Yes, it is. I wanted to see - hypothetically - how a reasonable person would interpret the phrase.

It applies to another thread because Rich apparently feels his usage of the phrase constitutes an apology to TessB. Personally, I don't believe the phrase can possibly be a sincere apology and I have never heard it used as such. Nevertheless, I felt it was reasonable for me to seek an outside opinion into the matter before concluding whether Rich was full of crap or not.

Whether other people choose to apply the specifics of the other thread when answeering the poll is up to them.

Rich said:
Yes, and it's being driven by a lynch mob. :eek:
Tell you what, Rich. How about we do this: I delete this silly thread and we say no more about it. When Tess stops by next she can let us know whether she feels you apologized for hurting her feelings or not. If she did, I will apologize to you for unduly questioning your behavior. If not, you will apologize to her - with no concession as to whether the points of your argument are right or wrong - for hurting her feelings. Sound fair?
 
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