Joke for unmarkedhelicopter (1 Viewer)

[Brianwarnock]

Hi I see that you have changed your name and signature so thought you might enjoy this joke sent to me by my daughter.

Brian

A blonde pilot decided she wanted to learn how to fly a helicopter. She
went to the airport, but the only one available was a solo-helicopter. The
Instructor figured he could let her go up alone since she was already a
pilot for small planes and he could instruct her via radio.

So up the blonde went. She reached 1,000 feet and everything was going
smoothly. She reached 2,000 feet. The blonde and the Instructor kept
talking via radio. Everything was running smoothly. At 3,000 feet the
helicopter suddenly came down quickly! It skimmed the top of some trees
and crash landed in the woods. The Instructor jumped into his jeep and
rushed out to see if the blonde was okay.

As he reached the edge of the woods, the blonde was walking out.

"What happened?" the Instructor asked. "All was going so well until you
reached 3,000 feet. What happened then?"

"Well," began the blonde, "I got cold. So I turned off the big fan."

 

[Ron_dK]

Hi I see that you have changed your name and signature so thought you might enjoy this joke sent to me by my daughter.

Just for my curiosity, who was (s)he before (s)he became a helicopter ?

 

[Brianwarnock]

I think I might be losing it, but I'm sure I saw it change on a thread we were both contributing to, it went from Unmarkedhelicop with a count of 40 to Unmarkedhelicopter with a count of 1 posts but I've just been back there and its all under Unmarkedhelicopter.



Still the joke still applies.

Brian

 

[Ron_dK]

OK Makes sense Brian.

and yes I do appreciate the blond yokes as well

 

[unmarkedhelicopter]

Sorry, only just seen this, funnily enough ... via google
Yeah I did get the name changed so it matches my infamy elsewhere

got one back for you ...

Blind guy walks into a bar and orders a beer ...
After a minute or so he speaks out and says ...
Does anyone wanna here a blonde joke ?
The bar falls into a hush and the lady sitting next to him says
Me and my friend are blondes and we wrestle professionally at the arena up the street.
The two ladies on your other side of you teach martial arts at the gym over the road and they are both blondes.
Finally the bar owner, who is also does her own security and served you your drink is blonde, she also has a baseball bat under the counter in case of trouble. So tell me do you still wanna tell your joke ?
The guy listenes to all this, looking more crestfallen as the situation unfolds, he waits a comple of seconds whilst he reconsiders and then says "Nah ! Not if I gotta explain it 5 times !!!"

 

[Brianwarnock]

LOL

Brian

PS you may not know it and if you do or don't I take no offence, but I have lousy vision, no central vision in right eye and no perifferal in left which was a "lazy" eye and not used till right went AWOL, but lets face it all jokes point fun at something, but that was a great blonde joke.

 

[sandy6078]

Brian,

I have a 13 year old son who went blind at 2 1/2. He gets a big thrill out of making us sighted people laugh at his blind jokes. Those who don't know him well look a bit shocked and uncomfortable when he walks into a room with a bag over his head yelling "I can't see, I can't see!"

They also look confused if he wants to "look" at something and will say "Let me see it" and then examines the item with his hands and sometimes even his tongue. He also likes to impress people with his ability to read Braille with his tongue.

He is afterall a 13 year old boy and we all know how goofy and gross 13 year old boys can be.

 

[Brianwarnock]

That's a great story Sandy, whilst I obviously feel sorry for the boy I only have admiration for his spirit and guess that he would not want any pity.

Brian

 

[sandy6078]

No, he does not want pity. My only heartache for him is his lack of friends. People at school all say hi but not many come over and he rarely goes with someone else. He does have all his internet friends with whom he games. Two young men on your side of the pond, one from the UK and the other from Spain. A guy from Canada and many more around the states. Most are older some in late teens and early twenties. I like that he knows other blind people who are going on to further their education. He is an excellent student but does not like school. Usually all A's although this next grading period I don't think he is going to do so well in band.

When Zach was nine and first started getting really interested in the internet I watched very carefully, still do. Anyway, he asked me one night to wake him up early the next morning because he had a chat date with a girl. I said Ok and then he asked me what university he should tell her went to because she was 18 and she thought he was a university student. Now, I'm always asking him how old the people are he is talking to and making sure they know how old he is.

He doesn't use IM much anymore but prefers talking to friends on Skype while they play an internet game. He types about 60 words a minute and want to be a software designer.

 

[unmarkedhelicopter]

That is an inspirational story, I knew a blind couple when I was young (guess they must have met that way) they always said "Thank god we are not deaf, that really cuts you off from people" I always thought that was wierd cos 90 odd percent of human input is sight. By training I am am engineer, but have always had a really well developed spacial awareness and when I see an object I can virtually see it from all sides and hazard a good guess at it's internals too. That's why I took it as a personal affront when I had to start wearing some sort of vision correction (glasses). But when I see a blind person walking down the street in a busy town (even with a dog) I have nothing but admiration as I know I would be cr@pp1ng myself doing that !!!

The blind bit in the joke is just to make it work, otherwise the guy would come off a bit insensitive

 

[dan-cat]

He types about 60 words a minute and want to be a software designer.

He sounds too intelligent for that...

 

[sandy6078]

Well, when he was little he wanted to be an inventor and invent a money tree.

I came home from work one day and he was reading an article on line and trying to learn C. He wants a computer of his own. I told him when he was 15 he would get one since he won't be able to drive. He asked me if I could take him to a big parking lot so he could drive just once. That idea scares me but I will probably let him try it. He drives my nephew's go cart with a directional help from his cousin. They do pretty well together except when his cousin forgets his right from his left and crashes them into a cornfield or outbuilding. No harm done. His Grandma has a fit at some of the things he does.

 

[MrsGorilla]

Brian,

I have a 13 year old son who went blind at 2 1/2. He gets a big thrill out of making us sighted people laugh at his blind jokes. Those who don't know him well look a bit shocked and uncomfortable when he walks into a room with a bag over his head yelling "I can't see, I can't see!"

They also look confused if he wants to "look" at something and will say "Let me see it" and then examines the item with his hands and sometimes even his tongue. He also likes to impress people with his ability to read Braille with his tongue.

He is afterall a 13 year old boy and we all know how goofy and gross 13 year old boys can be.

Wow. I have great admiration for how he is handling it. Do you mind if I ask what caused his blindness?

 

[sandy6078]

He is a great kid. It took (takes) alot of adjustment for our family. Zach has a cranial-facial syndrome. Doctor's cannot agree on which one. The major gist of it is that his head stopped growing and his brain continued to grow causing great pressure which either destroyed his optic nerves or the brain center at the base of the spinal cord. Doctor's are not sure on that one either. He needed to have surgery to enlarge his skull. He has a titanium plate in his head and many screws (after he was home from the hospital and healing well, I caught my oldest son trying to stick magnets to his head). He also ended up having to have a shunt because of the extra fluid in his brain cavity resulting from the surgery.