ShaneMan's daughter (1 Viewer)

Brianwarnock

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For those following this Shane posted this on Carepages at about 15:40 BST Saturday
Brian

Yesterday was doctor day. Nobody told us that but it had to be with the amount of doctors that we met with yesterday. Kate is going to be put on a rehab schedule, starting Monday, followed by rehab doctors, so the new rehab doctors showed up yesterday. Examined her and then went over with us what the plan of care/torture was for her next week. It is going to be pretty intense, so I'm feeling sorry for her already. We met with probably no less than 8 more doctors but they were mainly to check on how she's healing up. At 4pm we met with Dr. Pete Anderson. He's the lead doctor for her cancer. He had the results of the P.E.T. scan and the MRI. Kate still has a very tough road ahead and a big battle. The P.E.T. illuminates tumors and Kate's scan revealed that she has one big tumor growing on the outside of her vertebre at T3-T5 and there is a small tumor in/on (I really don't know which it is) her left lung. The tumor in her left lung is about the size of your pinky fingernail. Dr. Anderson sat with us for quite awhile and went over what our options are and gave us about 4 different ones to think about and make a decision on. The options mainly involve which chemo drug to use in conjunction with radiation. We have not met with the radiation therapy doctor, yet, but Dr. Anderson felt that the schedule will most likely be, once a day/five days in a row, for five weeks. This means Kate and Julie will not be coming home anytime soon, or it looks that way right now. Then after a few months, to scan her again and measure what the response of the tumors has been. The plan is to use next week to allow Kate to heal from her surgery and to get the rehab plan started, then the following week (Monday 8/18) to start the chemo-radiation. The only way the chemo-radiation won't start on that day is if the neuro doctors say she hasn't healed up good enough for her to get started. Any of my reports would not be complete without telling you Kate's response. Her response was the same as all the others that she has heard before. She understands everything that has been said to her and then just smiles and says "OK."

Everyone involved has some taxing days ahead but most especially Kate. We would appreciate it if you kept us in your prayers. I am certainly not saying that any of us wants to throw in the towel but sometimes when your fighting an opponent that just keeps tagging you with some real stinging punches, you at least have thoughts go through your head of wishing you weren't in this fight.

Have a good weekend,
Shane
 

Brianwarnock

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Please bear with me if I mess up but I have received an update on Kate and it is not good.
The Doctors are saying that nothing they are doing is working and that the family have to just enjoy what time is left, this appears to be around 6 months.

I am sure that Shane does not want any fuss but I thought that those who had responded to the thread would want to know, just give Shane a little slack if his posts don't always hit the mark.

Brian
 

MrsGorilla

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I'm so sorry to hear about that. From what I read, I was worried because it sounded like a pretty aggressive type of cancer. I can't imagine the pain you and your family must be feeling at the thought of losing a child. My thoughts and prayers are with you.
 

sandy6078

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Oh Shaneman, I am so very sorry. My families thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.
- God Bless.
 

TessB

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I read the news at work today but couldn't think of a thing to say in response.
I still have a hard time... but I'll just be honest here and say that I feel so helpless and wish there were ANY words that would bring comfort. But as a parent, I know they don't exist.
 

The_Doc_Man

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The saddest of all fates is for a parent to outlive his child, which is the direction this cancer seems to be headed.

Shane, no words will comfort you at this time. Our words will be cold at best given the absolutely devastating result you are seeing. Yet if you do what you can for your daughter, if you show her love and constancy, and if you show her that her condition does not affect your love for her... then one day when the (apparently) inevitable has happened, you will be able to look at yourself in a mirror and say, "I was a good father to my sick daughter when that was what she needed."

The depth of agony at the loss of a child is beyond my imagination. People say, "Oh, I know how you feel." But they don't know unless they've actually been there. The closest I can come is when one of the neighborhood kids developed an aggressive form of childhood leukemia and lasted about six months. I saw how it affected them but could not share fully in their pain. I know that the same will be true, and no one wants to have this kind of pain to know more about it.

Shane, keep your wits about you. Your family needs your strength now. Later, you can find a quiet room and wrestle with your inner demons. Until then, your daughter needs you. Good luck to you and your family. If the prognosis is correct, I hope for the most comfortable end for your daughter and the least amount of suffering.
 

oumahexi

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We can never be prepared for such an event, but I'm sure Shane and his family have a head start in that they have strong faith and Kate is such a strong character, a tribute to good parenting.

My thoughts are with you all.
 

Fifty2One

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We are keeping all of you in our hearts and thoughts.

I Said a Prayer for You Today

I said a prayer for you today
And know God must have heard.
I felt the answer in my heart
Although he spoke no word!

I didn't ask for wealth or fame
(I knew you wouldn't mind).
I asked him to send treasures
Of a far more lasting kind!

I asked that he be near you
At the start of each new day;
To grant you all the blessings
And friends to share your way!

I asked for serenity for you
In all things great and small.
But it was for his loving care
I prayed the most of all!
 

Rabbie

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Sorry to hear your news. Our thoughts and sympathy are with you and your family.
 

ShaneMan

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Thanks for your words guys. I really appreciate them. Please don't under estimate the power of words. For you guys to take the time to express yourselves to me makes me feel like there really are folks who care and to a certain degree it has a feeling on "getting under the load with me." No, you probably can't say enough words to take the pain completely away but you can say words that make a difference, so thanks for taking the time to say so.

Shane

P.S. I have a concern that some of the messages I sent did not get to folks so I thought I would note it here and make sure you did receive them.

Rich--I sent an email to you, before anything was posted and I wanted to make sure you got it. It was important to me that certain folks heard it from me and not read it on a post and you were one of them.

Tess--I replied to you PM and want to make sure you got it.

Oumahexi--I first sent an email to you before anything was posted and then realized I sent it to the wrong person. (sorry about that) and then I attempted to reply to your PM and got a message that said you were not receiving PM's, so I emailed you (made sure I got the right person this time), so I wanted to make sure you got yours.
 

TessB

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Shane,

Yes, I did get your reply to my PM. I just haven't had a moment today to respond. This work week has been maddening. (I'll cover that in detail in my What's happening thread at some point.... maybe this weekend)

I wish to thank you here though, for saying our words do help. My feeling of helplessness were allieviated a little by hearing that. And the irony is, you have given comfort to people who wish only to give you comfort.

How beautiful is that?

Thank you Shane.
 

oumahexi

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Sorry Shane, I changed my email address on the forum and that seems to have caused a problem with pms, they are working now. I'll pm you my email address again, nothing came through.

As you know, my thoughts are with you. It's never easy to figure out exactly why a God you love so much allows tragedy in our lives, but you can rest assured that there is a reason. We may never find that reason in this lifetime but we will be given answers one day. I am sure you and your family are well equiped to keep your faith strong.
 

Rich

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Rich--I sent an email to you, before anything was posted and I wanted to make sure you got it. It was important to me that certain folks heard it from me and not read it on a post and you were one of them.
I've not had one since the "air guitar" putting a smile on Kate;)
 

ShaneMan

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I've not had one since the "air guitar" putting a smile on Kate;)

I'm really sorry that it went this way, Rich. I do have you in my contacts and did send an email to you based off of the email address I have, so either that one is wrong or cyberspace ate the email I sent to you. I really wanted you to hear from me first before you read it on a post. I feel bad that it went the way it did.

Shane
 

ShaneMan

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Sorry Shane, I changed my email address on the forum and that seems to have caused a problem with pms, they are working now. I'll pm you my email address again, nothing came through.

As you know, my thoughts are with you. It's never easy to figure out exactly why a God you love so much allows tragedy in our lives, but you can rest assured that there is a reason. We may never find that reason in this lifetime but we will be given answers one day. I am sure you and your family are well equiped to keep your faith strong.

I got your email and have replied to it. Hopefully, this one makes it.

Shane
 

Rich

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I'm really sorry that it went this way, Rich. I do have you in my contacts and did send an email to you based off of the email address I have, so either that one is wrong or cyberspace ate the email I sent to you. I really wanted you to hear from me first before you read it on a post. I feel bad that it went the way it did.

Shane
Don't feel bad at all Shane, I'm not in the least offended or upset;)
 

ShaneMan

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Hello my AWF family. I wanted to make a quick post to let all of you know that Kate lost her fight with cancer yesterday. She had been sent home from the hospital, in Oct., and was told then that there was nothing more they could do for her so we know it was a matter of time before this day would show up. Julie took care of Kate all the way to yesterday and was able to have many conversations with her that she will always treasure in her heart. We were all given a lengthy time frame to say what we needed to say and do what we wanted to do with her. Kate really began having difficulty in breathing, for the past week or so and once that started, things progressed rapidly. On Sunday she was having so much problems that she asked for us to call in the hospice nurses and wanted to be sedated so she could go in her sleep. We honored her wishes even to the end. Due to this we were all able to say our good-byes and she was able to give us our last set of instructions from her on what she would like to see each of us accomplish. She thanked those of us that cared for her and then went to sleep. Approximately 24 hours later, she passed away. Our faith, aids us in believing we know where she is and that we will be united again someday. Kate was wise beyond her years and a huge inspiration to many. I will miss her.....everyday.

Thanks to you guys for staying in touch and for caring. I am not posting to get anyone's attention but did want to post and finish this thread with how her story ends.

Thanks for listening,
Shane
 

boblarson

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Shane:

Our family's deepest condolences and prayers are with you at this time. From all of your descriptions, Kate was a true gift from God that was here all too briefly. As the father of 3 I can only imagine the pain that you, and your wife, must feel at this time. I thank you for your sharing of the things you have gone through. It helped to bring a little piece of reality to our world here on the forum.

God bless
 

Banana

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My deepest sympathies; we had a scare when my cousin had cancer which has since went into remission. Coupling this with your experiences, makes me appreciate how precious yet fragile a life is. It's great that you and Julie had time and conversations to treasure. Hope everything will work for best.
 
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Shane I am so sorry for your loss. I pray that you and Julie will overcome this and continue to be strong.
 

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